barriers

we were good until you asked that question.

and NO it does not affect me

but il will change the way you think of me 

because boundaries and walls and lines

are more important that things you already know

things you've experienced

things you loved.

Because we were taught to listen to this

and do that

dont look here

stay quiet

Our innocence was stipped away from our voice

that will not be heard anymore

Looking at you now just smiling makes me thing

Do i tell her the truth to keep it real

or do i lie so she dont think bad about me?

But that smile is only waiting for a response.

See why would this matter now?

What about the memories from yesterday

and all we've been through.

What happened to that!

Just because my parents wanted the best for me

so they sacrificed their lives for my better future. 

But the fact that they did what only

parents ought to do does not make me

any less than what you currently thnk of me or 

what you will think of me

whether it was a wall or a line or an ocean i

crossed your only concern is my 

answer yet your beautiful

smile is depending on it

This all has been a political scam

that i feel sorry you were the product of 

decades of fraud to make you think

negative of my anticipated response.

I know babe you are only waiting for me to answer

but realize that 

sometimes our actions and feelings are not always connected.

Rent, 

food, 

car, 

insurance 

does not pay for itself

and No I did not stripped anyones opportunity

to do better. I wanted to do better. 

I worked hard to get to where

I am not

to be judged by an answer.

But if we only didnt have that wall, that imaginary line, you

You would not care about my answer. BUT WE DO.

That butter smooth skin of your face now touches my hand caressing

your  hair and foundly looking into each other. DEEP.

Time stops

and that smiles begins to fade away

only because you already know my answer

but have not heard it from my lips.

And I smoothly teary and hopeful

must confess and answer now.

I know that this will change the course of things

but for now you deserve to know. 

NO.

-tony 4/7/16